


Keep Our Expectations Low

by undernightlight



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Discovery
Genre: Canon Compliant, Missing Scene, No Romance, Season/Series 02
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-20
Updated: 2020-06-20
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:20:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24830725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/undernightlight/pseuds/undernightlight
Summary: Christopher worries about Spock
Relationships: Christopher Pike & Spock
Comments: 1
Kudos: 27





	Keep Our Expectations Low

Chris laid in bed staring at the wall. He couldn't sleep. Not from lack of trying, but his brain, it seemed, just didn't feel like being quiet. Thoughts would race and pass through him so fast he could barely comprehend them, and he definitely didn't remember them, yet they were there. He'd close his eyes and try to force his mind blank but the concentration needed for that gave no room to relax. Eventually, he resorted to counting the exposed rivets of the bulkhead, hoping at some point his brain would be unable to keep up and finally shut down. That had yet to happen, and he was up to three hundred and eighty four. 

_"Sometimes it's wise to keep our expectations low, Commander. That way, we're never disappointed."_

The words had left his mouth before he'd really thought about it. They seemed appropriate for Burnham's situation. He wasn't sure how truly relevant they were to him though. He wasn't disappointed in Spock, not like the way a parent with a misbehaving child, but instead... If he was honest with himself, Chris wasn't really sure why he felt disappointed. He wasn't exactly expecting Spock to come to him and talk about his feelings - Spock didn't even talk about his feelings with himself let alone anyone else - but somehow Chris has still hoped he might. They were friends, at least he thought so, so he would've hoped that his friend would feel - not a completely accurate term - comfortable enough to confide in him. Apparently he didn't. Again, part of Chris knew Spock wouldn't, but part of him had hoped.

Maybe it wasn't disappointment. Maybe he just felt let down. Or that he was letting down Spock. All Chris really knew for sure was that he was worried and he wouldn't stop worrying until he knew Spock was safe. That, and that Chris missed him immensely. 

When he disclosed to Burnham the true whereabouts of her brother, he couldn't help but feel guilty. He had betrayed his friend. It didn't sit quite right with him, but with everything going on he didn't have a choice. That's what he had to tell himself. There were definitely disadvantages to being so close to the crew. His crew. His friends. 

He was bored of the bulkhead rivets, and sat upright in his bed. He dragged a hand down his face as he debated his options, before flinging his legs from the bed, but he moved too fast and his body tensed. He'd yet to fully recover from the phaser blast to his chest and he kept forgetting that. Carefully he stood and dressed - casual, he wasn’t putting the uniform back on - before heading down to sickbay. He wasn't the biggest fan of sleepy hyposprays, but anything to stop him worrying. 

There was no way Spock killed those doctors. He refused to believe it. He'd known Spock for years, they were close, so he knew Spock couldn't have killed anyone. He knew it. He knew it. He...hated that something in him doubted everything he knew about Spock's character. Something had changed within him some time back, but he knew now that it had to do with the signals, at least partially, but he couldn't be sure until he could talk to Spock himself. He hoped he'd see him soon.

He was always worried about him, but at least before he knew where Spock was. Now, he was on the run, wanted for murder, and it made Chris feel sick. When he saw Spock - because they were going to find him and help him and prove him innocent - Chris was going to hug him. He wasn't sure Spock would like that, or if he'd approve of such an emotional gesture, but Chris really wouldn't care, as long as he was safe. 

He wiped his eyes quickly as he walked down the corridor. He smiled at the few crewmen he passed on the way and most smiled back. He was in and out of sickbay fast, getting two strays, one for the pain and one for sleep, and he took them back to his quarters. Stripping back down, he slid back into bed and injected the sprays. The pain relief began to work almost instantaneously and he was grateful, the walk down to sickbay putting further strain on his body - Pollard had told him so when he got there.

He paused for a few seconds, staring at the seconds spray in his hand. He wondered if he’d be plagued by stress dreams. They weren’t uncommon things for him, when he was worried or anxious or just overworked. Ultimately, Chris knew he could deal with that, or more accurately he would have to deal with it if the issue arose. He injected the spray, and eventually fell asleep, worrying about Spock until he was no longer conscious.

**Author's Note:**

> I've had this sitting around for a while, and finally remembered about it, oops.


End file.
